Ugh.

Missing someone is such an indescribeable and hollowing feeling.

[After a looooong shift last night, I think the need for "me time" shouldn't need much explaining.....]

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March the Tenth
It was on this day in 1876 that the inventor of the telephone, Alexander Graham Bell, made the first successful phone call. He picked up the receiver and spoke to his assistant, Thomas Watson, who was in the next room. He said, “Mr. Watson – come here – I want to see you.” To his shock, Watson heard him. Later that day, Bell wrote an excited letter to his father. He wrote, “The day is coming when telegraph wires will be laid on to houses just like water and gas – and friends converse with each other without leaving home.” In 1915, transcontinental telephone lines were finally completed. Alexander Graham Bell was part of the dedication of the lines in New York, and he called up Thomas Watson, who was now living in San Francisco. Bell said the same thing he had said almost 40 years earlier: “Mr. Watson – come here – I want to see you.” Watson said that it would take him a week to get there.
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It was on this day in 1785 that Thomas Jefferson was appointed the American ambassador to France, succeeding Benjamin Franklin. Before his trip to France, the farthest that Jefferson had traveled from his home in Virginia was to Philadelphia. He loved Paris, and he was popular there, and made friends with many prominent people. His wife had died a couple of years earlier, so Jefferson took his two daughters along to Paris. And he also took two slaves: James Hemings, who trained as a French chef in Paris, and Sally Hemings, who came to take care of his daughters. Jefferson probably began his long-term affair with Sally while he was in Paris. He served as ambassador for four and a half years, until 1789, and 12 years later he became the third president.
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The first Book-of-the-Month Club selection was published on this day in 1926.
It was the Lolly Willowes, by English novelist Sylvia Townsend Warner. The Book-of-the-Month Club was the brainchild of Harry Scherman. He found that it was much harder to market new books than classics. So he invented the Book-of-the-Month Club, where a prestigious committee chose a book each month. That way readers could be sure that the book they were getting was worth their investment. Membership grew steadily, even through the Great Depression, and by 1966, the club had more than 1 million members.

Chuck Norris is 69 years old today. Holds up well???

Slowly losing
Knowing that I will be alright

Finding no shelter here
Below the surface

Help me find a way
Out of this mess

I hate you, but I love you.
I want you, but I wish you’d fall off a cliff.
I need you, but you disgust me.

You love me, but you’ve destroyed me.
You want me, but you can’t keep your hands off of other people.
You need me, but you push me away at every turn.

All I’ve been doing lately is waiting for him to call, reading fanfiction in hopes of drowning out my thoughts, and looking up lyrics to fit my mindset at the time. One minute I’m like “Hey, I need some quotes about being in love and being happy.” Next minute, “I had a fucked up day, need some quotes about mindgames.”

I’m just as confusing as he is. Maybe that’s why we’re so fucking perfect for eachother. We’re just as bipolar as the other, maybe we balance eachother out perfectly. It all sounds so wonderful in theory – but what’s going to keep me from shooting him in the forehead? And how am I ever supposed to trust him again?

Believe me when I say that I have heard it all. I know what’s the healthy decision would be, but it doesn’t matter. It would take a hell of a lot more than rational thinking and logic, to tear me away from that man. I don’t know when it happened, but he became a part of me, and as much as I’ve tried to push him away and pretend otherwise over the years, he and I are connected in what is seemingly, the worst and most unpleasant way. But he holds the key to everything I want and need out of life, so perhaps I’ll get lucky and things’ll work out?

He is offering to pay for me to fly to Kansas, where his permanent post is, and back, as well as a hotel room for the weekend. And he’s also offering to Western Union the money to me, so that he wouldn’t even have to know which Hotel I’d be staying at. He and I are going to have a hell of a time trusting one another again.

He is on his way to his permanent post as we speak, having just left his last layover. I’m excited for him, I think that life and his job is going to be a whole lot less stressful now that he’ll be at his permanent post. No longer will be the bitch, but a real U.S soldier. I am more proud of him than I could ever express, though he doesn’t understand why. He seems to think that anyone could make it through Boot Camp and training to become a soldier, but that’s not my reasoning. It has more to do with the fact that he got up and devoted himself to a purpose, deciding to do something with his life. I’m still living at home, and bitching about it. Yeah, I have an interview on Monday, but if I wouldn’t have fucked up my eduation in High School, I’d be a lot further right now. -Shrugs.- Guess you have to work with what you have, though.

Steven’s on, so I’m going to go make fun of him. ;x toodles.

I’m really considering quitting my job. i have no time for myself, let alone anyone else. And March Break is coming up which would be a perfect time relax, right? wrong. i have driving school from 9-3 from the 16th to the 20th. i guess i have the whole afternoons to myself considering there is no night school and i took that week off work, but it’s about waking up next to him every morning the same time he wakes up. or waking up to only find that he has been up looking at me sleep the whole time. i’m too busy during the week and i don’t like it. i don’t like it at all. and the only solution i have is to quit my job because than i’ll have tuesdays, thursdays, fridays and sundays all to myself which will be such a stress releaver. i get to hang out with all my friends at coreys or at my place or a bethans ! i can actually spend quality time with my boyfriend. i mean, i’ve been so busy that i didn’t even know about the party mark is having at his house on friday until like yesterday. but it was planned a while ago ! so, shows how much i suck. so yeah, really considering quitting my job and getting one again after night school is finished. i guess we’ll see.

Yesterday afternoon and the guests to talk about a thing, a friend made a phone call: Baby evening free? I’ll take you to eat salmon. I said: “ah time, you came to pick me, I do not want to eat salmon, eat Pig sauce. Friend added:” You are not very fond of eating salmon it? Well-behaved, do not eat pig’s feet, too greasy. “I willful said:” well-behaved, it is necessary to Pig sauce. “Hung up the phone to meet the needs of laughter.

The guests said: “Oh, you did not expect such a soft side, ah boyfriend.” I said: “girlfriend.” His eyes wide open: “girlfriend?” (God, what do think, I am not Comrade ) immediately embarrassed response: “Oh, wrong, and is the boyfriend.”

Some people say: among women is more ambiguous than the nicotine poisoning, the enjoyment of such ambiguous and occasionally kiu, fun.

Recalling another group net Name: dust female (male), pigs eight referrals (handsome), Lost fish (small MM), home (old man), handsome Recycle Bin (pretty young woman), Ferrari, para three eyes, lonely Departed, alternative tomatoes, not to leave. . . . Highly deceptive network ah really strange people dumbfounding.

Speaking of which Rose is the sister-in-law all sorts of feelings. Sister-in-law is a beautiful and wise woman intellectual, but also so much admiration for the great Rosa mother. In the aftermath of the middle-aged son, a huge blow after the marriage, sister-in-law did not fall, the pain had cried after she accepted his fate is still optimistic about the smile of life.

Sister-in-law was a university teacher, the typical woman in Chongqing, both men and women of the delicate open-minded. I do not know what kind of language in order to evaluate the most appropriate for her, I only know that this is a woman, son in sick again after a friend of my colleagues for their contributions, the number of let me speechless; take care of the child in the three years leading up and down more of its Is a green light all the way to give her the most convenient; at the end of his life still Bulibuqi, with more than 100,000 to extend the life of his son two months to write the mother of the most respected the human world tragedies; whose families are in a crisis Friends had their own son went to live on the sofa, to vacate their living room, from the body and mind are given to the best of the best in every possible way be nursed back to health care, until now have not a complaint … … This story also , But each of the stories are so deeply touched by Rosa! Family home, there are countless friends to help and be tolerant. I do not know the people mountain city of such conduct or sister-in-law of the settlement were good at, but she’s been doing things every detail all thoughtful and so impressed and touched by Rosa.

But this is a woman, God gave her in the immeasurable wisdom when they give her the greatest pain, I can not refer to his anger-day injustice, I can only sister-in-law for the fate of the deep sigh!

Ion to Cardiff, and I am President, in this sister-in-law is the only relatives, although many close friends sister-in-law, I know that no matter how deep a friendship can not be replaced in the hearts of the people’s desire for love. Since then, this sister-in-law, in addition to feelings of the outside rose a more responsibility.

Great pain has gone through great suffering of the sister-in-law, the future will no longer have a dark sadness, and only by so doing, Rose believed that only God’s justice.